According to Aristotle, Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies. (That’s one of my favorite quotes by him.) Friendship is a very beautiful thing, and from my experiences it is very hard to find. It is also very subjective. If we were to ask a hundred people to give their definition of a friend, its a big possibility that you would end up with 100 different answers. (Get my drift, very subjective).Now down to the main reason of this post. WE ARE ALL ADULTS (for the most part). We all have a general idea of what friendship is and how it works. HOWEVER, as we get older it becomes harder to maintain certain friendships, and even harder to make new ones. So this post will serve as a crash course 101 to give you a few useful tips.
1. Boundaries- We are not children anymore and a lot of people have significant others, families, careers,school,demanding schedules, and this list could go on forever lol. So you have to respect others boundaries in order for the friendship to grow and continue growing. And for heaven’s sake don’t call your friend all the times of the night. Im sure his or her significant other or family wouldn’t like that.
2. Jealousy- its ok for your friend to have other friends. Never let a person make you feel bad for having more than one friend. Adults tend to have different categories of friends, for example :PTA Buddies, drinking buddies,workout buddies, church buddies, childhood buddies, and the list goes on and on.Also watch out for signs of possession.
3. Don’t put your friends in vulnerable situations- they are your friends not your body guards or your scapegoats. Don’t get me wrong lol the truth hurts. Always be honest to a person you care about no matter what and if they can’t appreciate that then TOUGH. Im so grateful for my bff Julie because she “keeps it real” even when I don’t want to hear it lol. That girl ALWAYS has my best interest in mind and I couldn’t ask for anything more.
4. Try to be there for the important things- I get that we are busy hard working adults but the smallest things make the biggest impact. Always try to be there for the person you care about regardless to if you are there in person, spirit, etc. One of my good friends lives 13 hours away from me but whenever I need her she is always a phone call away, and if she cant pick up the first time I call, she still always calls me back. No matter how busy or tired you are it is no excuse not to wish a friend a Happy Birthday or offer your condolences after they have lost a loved one or someone they cared about. Nope not acceptable. Now somethings are understandable you can’t always be at every get together,party, baby’s first step, or award ceremony , etc but at least make an effort. And always I repeat always TRY to make the important stuff for example graduations, weddings,etc.
5. Don’t be afraid to call it quits- It takes courage to walk away from things that are toxic and bad for you. Always remember quality or quantity. Its better to have 1 amazing friend than to have 100 bad ones. And please don’t be afraid to leave a harmful situation because of history or length of time. You owe it to yourself to be happy. Its going to be hard but if that friend isn’t fulfilling you, or bring positivity into your life, or lifting your spirit, then you need to call it quits.
Sidenote!!!!!!!! This isn’t by any manys a complete list. So if you feel like Ive missed a few things or didn’t quite touch on enough areas please let me know. I’d love to hear from you guys! Soooooooooo my question to you is “What is your definition of a true friend?” (Comment below)